Friday, August 31, 2007

The Prize Winning Pot Plant

I don't know what's wrong with me, I just never feel like posting these days and I've fully lost inspiration for EDW. It's a nightmare of sorts. I certainly don't feel worthy of a blog, so maybe just the one post will appease all my non existent readers (despite myself I like the idea that I can waffle away on this blog and be speaking to pretty much no-one. Bizarre eh?)

Let's start with the job front, I've been applying like crazy and have finally lowered myself to applying for "non design" jobs. Don't get me wrong. I'm a terrible snob, however I have decided that I can't be that much of a snob to be claiming dole and that if I really want some money to be able to put petrol in the car and swan off on weekends without having to beg for charity drinks, I must get a job.

So in with the usual design applications crept 3 non design jobs.

1. Cashier at my local HSBC. As far as I can tell I'll have to serve very stupid people and be nice to them, all whilst trying to dredge up my maths skills from the bottom recesses of my mind. On a plus though its a respectable job for "In Between" and they give me a day off in the week if I work a Sat, meaning I can get job interviews without taking time off. I have my initial telephone interview on Monday at 9am, so I'll have to think up reasons why I want a career in banking that don't include "coz I need a job"

2. Careers/Jobs Advisor at a local University. Yes that's right, I, the girl who can't get a job would be advising others on how to get jobs of their own. Not a good idea. On the plus its part time (not good for the money side) but I'll again be able to go to interviews, and possibly use all those contacts to get myself a (better) job

3. This is the one that I can't quite bring myself to apply for, but that I think will be hilarious. Detention Officer in St Paul's area of Bristol. For anyone not from "these parts", St Paul's is rough, spelt R-u-f-f, innit. But I like the idea of flooring big crack addicts and getting to lock them up in the back of my (standard issue) riot van. Maybe not.

On a brighter note I got a job interview in Sheffield on Tuesday which means I get to see Julia and Chris on Tuesday night before driving home. I'm still waiting to hear from Adrem about the Newcastle job, but I forgot to ring this afternoon, due to the major distraction that was shopping with mum in town! Opps, best ring on Monday.

In other news, Stu got a place in college and starts on Monday, well done stinky :D

Oh I nearly forgot, the Corsley Show results...I got First prize for my "foliage pot plant", and a Black and white photo from Italy, and a second for my portrait of mum. Happy days. It was a great day in all, the sun shone a lot and the traffic jam was backed up to the bypass (there's never normally that level of interest...).
I also met some delightful new people, only to be denied a phone number by virtue of being dragged off to do important steward things before I had a chance. I am now on the hunt, trying not to look too stalkerish, I will get his number. I WILL. Ok, slightly stalkerish, but we got on well, giggled about Green Wing (the way directly to this girls heart) and lamented over how hard it is to get a job in creative industries. In reality I really want to make friends round here if I'm going to be stuck here for a while, there's only so much sitting on the sofa watching TV a girl can take.

Tomorrow I go to watch the Mothership dance in a show, and potentially get information on Film Guy...*rubs hand in glee*.

Ok I'll stop now, I'm not a stalker*, honest


*Isn't that what stalkers say...?


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Now playing: Foo Fighters - Free Me
via FoxyTunes

Sunday, August 26, 2007

The Corsley Show

Is is wrong to have strawberries and cream for breakfast? Answers on a postcard please.

My weekend has been short, in terms of my plans. Having spent Friday night in Reading I returned home due to a lack of people to amuse me midday on Saturday. The friend I was visiting and staying with buggered off and left me to fend for myself, so home it was. As it was the preceding evening had been somewhat of a wash out, being home and in bed asleep by midnight. Not what I was expecting.

Needless to say the journey home yesterday was enjoyable, it was sunny outside, I had Amy Winehouse and Mr Hudson to keep me company and I managed a delightful singalong despite sitting in the grockle* traffic for half an hour. On arriving home I was dispatched to Sainsburys for the purchasing of berries for Eton Mess and buns for homemade burgers. I love my brother for his cooking (oh yeah, and because he's my brother I suppose)

Now comes for a mention of the annual village show. My parents seem to be the upstanding kind that get into village life, and indeed help organise the competition side of things at the show. This mainly consists of marshalling little old ladies around a huge marquee, making sure they've put their plum jam in the right place for judging.

I am of course encouraged to participate in the competitions and this year I'll be entering a painting I did of the Mothership and some photos. Normally I'd also enter the fiercely contested world of baked goods, but not this time round. Also due to my ever increasing age, I am now gaining more responsibilities on Show Day, this has blossomed from a runner to data entry for the winners and judging of the classes. Tbh if I whine about it I'm not being honest. I do enjoy spending time with my family participating in the truly innocent and English activity of "Largest Marrow" and "Celebrity Lookalike Vegetable".

And that wasn't me being sarcastic either. No really, it wasn't

* I love that term, its so brilliantly "local" and no-one further east of Dorset knows what it means. Genius
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Now playing: Amy Winehouse - You Know I'm No Good
via FoxyTunes

Thursday, August 23, 2007

Neglect

I apologise, I have been slack over the past few days and weeks, not posting and posting very late indeed. But as most of you are well aware sometimes you just don't want to write.

I have at this moment just got back from the beach at Poole and have that delightfully sandblasted feel to my face, although I have sand everywhere! It was a lovely day and nice to spend some time with Mum, even if she has shocked and appalled me with some of her comments on homosexuality. She brought me up to be liberal, and it turns out that she doesn't believe that gays should have the same "rights" as married heterosexuals. Her argument was hypocritical and disrespectful to so many people from so many backgrounds and walks of life, that I was ashamed of her. I think I have even lost a little bit of respect for her. Nonetheless I love her, and we had a good day discounting the tragic comments towards the end.

The last week has been relatively devoid of activity however now I look back I have been a little busy indeed.

The Friday night/Saturday morning was spend with an old school friend who a year ago joined the RAF. We had some fun in Lincoln before things turned sour by the act of a guy she works with. I'm not going to say any more, but I was upset at the lack of respect he showed her, and I don't think I'll be going to stay with her again whilst she is stationed at Cranwell with him nearby.

Sunday was spent recovering from a horrible hangover and making preparations to see a friend in Reading this weekend coming up.

Job hunting has also started to consume me, I feel myself obsessively checking, double checking and triple checking the job boards all day long hoping to pounce on any new titbit of info. That approach doesn't seem to be working, but I have received 2 communications (a phone call and an email) from 2 companies that seem interested in me. Its early days so I won't speculate, but one is in Newcastle and the other Kent. Not exactly convenient from my current location!

On a similar, however totally unrelated thread of thought, Mum revealed to me that I am indeed 1 quarter Gordie. This came as a slight shock to me, being a born and bred Southerner who has a pathological fear of our cousins up north. And The Way They Talk To You In The Street. Oh well, if I'm going to live there I might as well get used to it and discover my roots...

I've also being filling some time on ebay, which isn't providing me with much luck, so those of you who need a pair of Dune floral wedges in your life, get your size 7 feet over to this item....

I also have a new friend in my life. He's always been a friend, but he's now more of a friend than before. And I like it. So this will probably be my only post of this week as I'm going to see my newest friend this weekend.

And no EDW this week, as I've only just remembered - I'll do 2 next week to make up for it...tho someone might have to remind me to do that...

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Now playing: The Go! Team - Ladyflash
Now playing: The Go! Team - Namnlöst spår 3
via FoxyTunes

Thursday, August 16, 2007

New Moto

If you can't be employed, fill your day with beauty treatments
So Tuesday I dyed my hair, yesterday I extensively exfoliated and moisturised in preparation for today when I fake tanned. I'm not a huge fan of faking the tan, but with a family risk of skin cancer I leave the house in no less than factor 15-20. Generally I do get a light tan on my arms from just being out and about, but my legs never budge from milk bottle white. Not to mention the lack of a summer this year, so I've decided to fake it, just to take the edge off. I'm not quite sure how I'm supposed to get coverage on my back yet - I'm also too tight to pay to have it done for me...
So rather than bringing sexy back, I'm bringing white back. Get it. Oh it's tickled me...he he he

I've also found this updated plug in for Mozilla, so you know what I'm listening to. Cool, eh?
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Now playing: Kasabian - U Boat
via FoxyTunes

Elegantly Dressed Thursday: Gwyneth Paltrow

I have to admit I thought today was Wednesday - the perils of unemployment for you there...

This week I've decided to go modern, and I've nominated Gwyneth Paltrow for my EDT.

She has managed in recent years to remain tastefully silent in an increasingly sensationalist tabloid world, she refuses to be drawn into comment on "celebrity" issues and remains dignified in the face of the world's press - I greatly admire her that she's strong enough to walk the red carpet alone, and that she doesn't feel the need to parade her husband up and down like some sort of trophy.

And although I'm not into the "wife stays at home" mentality of society, I respect that she has made the decision to stay at home and look after her children. I get the feeling she's strong enough now to make these decisions without the loss of any pride and dignity.

Mores to the point, she maintains an elegant poise on the rare occasions that she appears in the press for everyday occurrences, and generally is pulled together on most occasions (we can forgive a PMS ridden Gwyneth for blubbing at the Oscars, I think).

I've noted in my own nominations that the ladies I choose tend to be strong, dignified and elegant in more than just their dress sense, but their attitudes to life, love, work and their public appearances. What jolly Britishness. I think we've rubbed off on Gwyneth.

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Money schemes

Firstly I have a friend back, so thank you :)

When people find out that I'm planning on dying my hair (being a bit of a chameleon in that respect) they are always shocked that I would ruin my lovely warm brown hair. What they don't realise is that I am in reality a natural blonde.

Fair as fair can be, but I have dark eyebrows and dye my hair brown. I found for years that I was treated as stupid being blonde, overnight in subtle ways I was treated better as a brunette. Respected a bit more, and treated like I might actually have something decent to say.

Of course when I muck up I can still say "well I am blonde you know". The best of both worlds.

I also found that on nights out I'd get approached by a whole load of idiots who thought I was stupid, now thank god I only get approached by the idiots who think they have a chance. Good luck to them! (oh and with reference to a conversation with a friend, pinching my bum before speaking to my face isn't going to work either...)

I'm also in the mood for money making schemes, and I have several on the go at the minute. Filing for Mum's company, selling stuff on ebay, playing the lottery and a possibility of trying out fundmydegree.com. Maybe with just £20 to start off with tho...its a bit scary!

so with that I must go and wash off the dye that is covering up the blonde coming through

Only one drawback with the dying regime. The blonde roots appear grey against the dyed colour. I'm only 22 but some have thought I've had a terrible accident and went white with the shock...

Monday, August 13, 2007

Neeeeeeeeeeeeeew Car

I have come to decide that working is overrated, along with money.

Maybe I'm just bitter that I don't have either, but I'm trying to believe it's just because being unemployed is so much more fun, able to galavant around without having to get up early on a Monday morning.

I can't remember whether I wrote about it at the time, but during the floods that devastated Gloucestershire, I crashed my car, a simple aquaplane into the back of a SportKa had mine written off, and duly my lovely Silver Corolla with a bashed in front was towed away on Tuesday last week.















This Saturday I picked up the new car, a shiny red Corolla with all mod cons. Slightly battered and a smell of cigarette smoke are the only issues, but I reckon a litre of Febreze, a paint touch-up stick and some sewing will do the trick.

Thursday, August 09, 2007

YouTube addiction

YouTube is my new favourite toy. I have resisted for so long, but a combination of Viagra (see below) and The Times' Top 10 Most embarrassing moments in pop, has left me with a hankering for the fun and delights of clips.

Combine that with my love of random humour (Green Wing, Simon Amstell and Bill Bailey) and spoof shows and I found this delight with Alan Yentob. Pure genius.

Unfortunately the BBC have been mean and won't allow me to embed the video, so follow this link, then this one, and finally this one.

I'm sure Americans won't get it tho....

Rubbish!

Things are getting a bit desperate chez ERA, and it's got to the stage now where I've applied to every design job I can find and had no takers.
I still haven't heard back from the interview on Friday, which I'm taking to mean I haven't got the job, considering they said they'd be in touch by "mid-week".

Gutted.

So today I applied to work part time in Monsoon. I feel really down about it at the moment, nothing is going my way, and because this shop is 20 min drive away, I'm sure one of the more local girls will get the job, despite the fact that I'm polite, clever and helpful.

Despite the blue sky outside, I haven't felt this grey in ages.

And it sucks, big hairy arse style.

Wednesday, August 08, 2007

Only in America...

EDW: Elizabeth I

ok, so an unusual choice I think, and certainly historical in many ways however this lady in my view goes some way to promoting feminism. The pioneer if you will.

Ok, so she didn't marry, and she viewed the ordinary woman's place in society in a very traditional way. But she proved that a woman could rule, and rule well. For 45 years. Certainly a long time in today's era of monarchy at any rate, let alone in Tudor times. She secured a house for her dynasty (albeit removed on her death and replaced with the Scottish Stuarts). And forced her image to transend from mortal to god.

She encouraged exploration and in those days, with Protestant England paling into insignificance against Catholic Spain, she held our corner well. Her navy defeated the Spanish in battle. Her political moves out foxed Philip of Spain many times (and had the paintings to prove it).

















She ended up with an iron rule over England and her colonies, and through all this was the centre of the English fashion world. Women wanted to be her, men wanted to be with her. she was fierce and fiery, fashionable and beautiful (ok so we might not think so now)

But who else could pull off collars like this? And who else could get away with wearing a white mask when all her skin had rotted off from the lead make up? Who indeed could wear that beautiful hunting outfit at the top without looking like a plonker? (Ok I concede that anyone of that era could, but how fabulous to be able to wear that??)







And I love the fact she gave her half brother this portrait of herself when she was 13 for his birthday! As if he could forget her!

Tuesday, August 07, 2007

Observation of the Day

When eating melon, one should always sit in a bath

Monday, August 06, 2007

Ohhhh so tired...

God what a long week, plus every time I sat down to post, I just didn't feel like it, so I'm here today for much grovelling to my dear readers - don't abandon me now!

Last week was boring - much time was spent preparing for my interview on Friday, and sorting out my Jobseekers allowance.

I'm really sick to the back teeth of central government. I went on Aug 1st to sign on for my first session. When I turned up they claimed they had no record of me, or my claim. Thankfully there was a member of staff free who look up my claim. Unfortunately the first woman I went to see for my initial interview had been new and misinformed me of my first appointment, so I had missed it and my claim had been cancelled. Being a terribly designed system they couldn't override the closure and reopen my claim. So I had to start again. I still have no money coming into my account and I'm owed 5 weeks of benefits. And I'm not likely to see them anytime soon.
At least the man I saw the next day to sort it all out was understanding and civil, almost verging on the helpful (shock horror).
More fun was to be had at the Job Centre as some 17 year old chav kicked off and the police had to be called. From what I gather the money hadn't been paid into his account so he couldn't pay his phone bill. He didn't seem too worried about how he was going to support the pregnant girlfriend and 3 other children...

The interview on Friday went well, I arrived 45 minutes early, thanks to AA route planner telling me it would take 2 hours, not the 1hr 15 it really took me. I went in, showed my portfolio, he asked barely any questions and we chatted about his holiday, my degree show and then had a tour of the office. Needless to say I was back out of the door 15 minutes later and on my way. Sounds bad, but in fact was really positive. Crossed fingers.

I then headed over to my old office and caused havoc for the rest of the afternoon, distracting people and generally being a nuisance to anyone trying to work...much fun, especially when you don't have to worry about them ever employing you again :D I also discovered they've changed all the company names, which isn't confusing for me, but I imagine for any outsiders probably would be.

And then out on Friday night to what seemed to be a dead and lifeless Reading. Hardly anyone was out, Bodie got incredibly drunk and pretended to lose his keys (great joke by the way) and in fact lost his phone, and we finally got home at 2am. Good fun tho, and it reminded me how much I like reading - this job in Uxbridge would be really good for me in that way. I could live in Reading, commute on the train, or drive, and still have all the friends from Mars I made in my placement.

So fast forward to today, and after a loooooooong sleep I am ready to tackle the delights of the day. Being unemployed that includes (but not limited to) tidying my wardrobe, hanging out the washing, reading "Dyson: Against the Odds" and sunbathing.

It really is tiresome. No really. It is.

Oh and I've been attacked my mosquitoes and I'm covered in itchy red lumps. Bastards.

Thursday, August 02, 2007

A Birthday Message

Happy Birthday to you,
You stink like Poo,
I smelt you on the loo-oo,
Happy Birthday to you.

that only took less than a minute. I'm quite proud of it.

Happy Birthday Stu.